Wonderful things come in small packages

Yesterday the mailman brought me something wonderful, a letter from Alberto!  Well actually it was three letters in a single envelope, but I was happy to have gotten something from him at all.  When he called me just as we were sitting down to dinner I got to tell him how happy it made me to get letters from him.  He jokingly asked me if I could read what he wrote, and I informed him I was an experienced interpreter of his letters.  The reason he asked me this question is that Alberto never finished high school and I believe his education more or less ended by the time he was 14.  His handwriting is poor at best and his spelling is pretty bad as well so it can be difficult to determine what he is trying to say.  He attended school here in the US for a couple of months to a year, but due to circumstances his family pulled him from school and sent him to work.  He told me several years ago that the reason he stopped going to school is because his cousins were trying to initiate him into their gang, Los Sureños, and his sisters intervened to save their youngest brother.  Knowing what I do about that particular gang and about his cousins, I am truly grateful that Yesica and Rosa moved to protect Alberto for their bad influence.  It was several months later that I actually met Alberto while working at McDonalds and our story began.  Anyway, in his letters he refers to me as mujer mia and mi amor several times which is probably the most romantic he’s ever been that I can recall.  I will say that it is difficult loving a Mexican man because the majority of them are constipated when it comes to emotions; it takes a laxative (beer) and great pain (the threat of a hangover) for them to confess their love.  Watch a George Lopez special, he does a bit about this and it wouldn’t be that funny if it wasn’t true.

I'm miffed that I can't go and see Alberto on Monday as we usually do because of the Holiday.  At this I have to admit that being in jail has apparently been good for Alberto since he’s found faith again after being without it for so long.  He writes to me about trusting in God and how he is content with just being about to see us after so long.  This change is mostly amazing to me since for years Alberto would only go to church on holy holidays and even then it was grudgingly.  Ok, so I promised myself that I wouldn’t get preachy because I know how much it irritates me when someone tries to force their beliefs or lack thereof down my throat.  I am not saying that my beliefs are better, but they are my beliefs and shall stay that way.  The first amendment to the Constitution was the freedom of religion, press, and expression.  With that said if you happen to pray, please take a moment and pray that justice may be served for us this coming week.

What will the impending governmental shutdown since those güeys don’t know the meaning of the word compromise; I may not have had healthcare coverage as of today.  It turns out that I will continue to have coverage since healthcare is considered a necessary program just like food stamps and unemployment.  Imagine that, healthcare is actually considered necessary.  Well, I saw my psychiatrist on Tuesday because I needed to get to see her since it has been a few months.  I guess I must be doing better since she said that she doesn’t need to see me for another 3 months, however if I need to come in earlier I may do so.  She recommended I find a therapist for more talk orientated therapy and gave me a card of someone she has worked with before.  I don’t know if I can go through this again with a therapist, but I feel like I should try since talking is the only thing that seems to help me.  I told her about the physical issues I have been having lately and she told me that they could all be manifestations of the stress I am forced to endure because of this situation.  Good to know that I’m fat and constantly ill because I’m stressed out.  I’m going to continue to medicate since it seems to be helping me.

I need to figure out who I will be seeing as a regular physician this time around.  I can’t to the Doctor I usually see because she’s not in the network for Medica, however she was in the Blue Cross Blue Shield network.  I had a difficult decision to make, and I believe I made the right choice.  I could either choose the provider that let me see the only medical professional I have ever seen consistently which is my OB/GYN, or I could go with any of the other providers and go to the clinic I’ve gone to for years yet have never seen the same doctor more than twice since I turned 18.  So I need to make an appointment to see my OB/GYN and figure out which name in the book looks like a good doctor.  The chances are the new physician will tell me to lose 50 pounds through diet and exercise then possibly try to refer me to a nutritionist.  Been there, done that and paid the $300 bill myself when my health insurance at the time just laughed at me.

Today was just ugly outside.    I brought 48 freezies over to Gisela’s house in the morning, and the girls were eating the last of them when I came to pick up Ashley that evening!  Even between the 10 children that may or may not have been present it works out to almost 5 freezies each and I bet the 1 year olds didn’t eat as many as the older children did.  We had a discussion at Gisela’s about which was worse; the heat in Mexico or the heat here in Minnesota.  El Primo, whose name I don’t actually know, said he prefers the dry heat in Mexico to the humidity we get here.  I said that I preferred this kind of heat to what I experienced in Mexico.  In the pueblo Alberto is from it was so hot I felt like I was being parboiled without actually being in the sun.  I know I had an epic sunburn on my arm at the time, but my face felt the worst.  If you have ever dry fried jalapeños to make salsa verde, those chilies understand my pain.  I couldn’t sleep because of the heat when we were as far away from each other on the bed as possible, so I really don’t understand how anyone would want to do the horizontal tango.  Ashley doesn’t do well with that kind of heat either, and Alberto actually said he prefers Minnesota over being fried like an egg on the hot sidewalk that is Mexico.

Hopefully tomorrow Alberto will get the books I ordered for him from Amazon.com and my letter shortly after that!  I’m going to try and get some sleep now although I’m not sure how that will go tonight.  My name is Deza Mendez, and for the last 3 years I have been an insomniac.

If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying. It's the worry that gets you, not the lack of sleep.

~Dale Carnegie

Ciao

Spanish words/phrases from this post:

Los Sureños:  A gang with origins in southern California (literally ‘The Southerners”)

Mujer Mia:  My Woman  (term of endearment in Spanish)

Mi Amor:  My Love

Güeys:  Fool, Dude  (Derived from buey: Ox)

Pueblo:  Small town