Thursday, April 10, 2014

Hold your vote

I have had no less than two fights with my husband this week, about two completely different things. The first argument was after his visa appointment; when he went to the consulate they told him that he needed to pay for the appointment and bring all the appropriate documents with him. He accused me at the top of his lungs of not telling him to bring the documents I sent nor did I mention he would have to pay for the appointment. It says in the last six or seven messages I sent him before the interview that he needed to print all the attachments to bring with him and that the money was in the account to pay the $230 appointment fee. It was a pointless argument since he retrieved the paperwork and they allowed him to interview later that afternoon (thank God). Thankfully Alberto is not one to stay angry very long and Lord knows I can't stay made at him because he is, after all, just a man.

The second argument was in regards to our darling daughter Ashley. She was in class when she took a pair of scissors and began cutting her hair. Since to the best of my knowledge they do not cover hair-styling 101 in Kindergarten these days, she was caught and the teacher emailed me about the incident. There was a picture of the small pile of hair under a chair as well as a picture of Ashley herself with the most hangdog expression you could ever imagine. Since this was just an interesting point in a child's life, I posted the story on my Facebook page with the pictures her teacher had sent me.

Alberto asked me immediately what the post said and became upset after I translated it for him. He said that problems within the family need to stay in the family and as such do not belong on Facebook. PERIOD. He said that I was making fun of our child, and that there was no good reason to put that information out there for everyone to see. I explained to him that I was neither laughing at our child nor was I approving of her behavior, I was simply looking for sympathy and/or stories from others who had experienced. I received several posts including one from my aunt about the time that her older sister (not my mom) cut her hair and left her with a bald spot.

From there the argument snowballed into how he feels that I never ask him for his opinion on anything concerning Ashley, and that he has no vote when it comes to our family. Rather than continue this argument, I deleted the post. I know if I had let the fight go on I might have gotten mean. I understand what Alberto was saying and I know the point is that I didn't consult him before posting that on Facebook nor did I tell him about the incident when I got the email from Ashley's teacher. When I got home I asked her why she was cutting her hair when she knew it was wrong, and she said it was just that she really wanted to have shorter hair. The problem was solved by taking her to Fantastic Sam's right after dinner.



No sweetheart... I haven't consulted you very often over the last 5 years and when I have you typically have no opinion. I guess I will try harder in the future to make Alberto feel included in the family decisions, if nothing else I know I can almost always to see things my way.



Ciao



Deza Mendez


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