Monday, December 31, 2012

Año Nuevo

Dear readers and friends, yet another year has come and gone without my best friend here by my side.  I'm a little older, perhaps a bit more cynical than before and seemingly no closer to the end of our personal immigration nightmare.  While everyone around me prepares to celebrate the coming of a new year with friends and lovers, I just want to sit in my room and watch Ice Age 4 with my darling daughter.  Instead I find myself forced to socialize with my brother, sister-in-law, and their 3 children.  The holidays just don't bring out the best in me these days...

Thursday, December 20, 2012

Business as usual

My husband has never been content with the status quo. It has been four months since Alberto left the United States with his brand new outlook on life. In that time he has gotten a job, fixed his car, and he is now buying an established business. He is determined to buy the creamery where he works from his boss despite the fact we don’t have the money to pay upfront. I asked him what he planned to do with the business if the waiver was approved and he said that this business would provide a way of life for his family. I don't know what other people might think but to me it seems like a win-win situation.  If worst comes to worst it would mean that we should have at least one income to help us survive in Mexico until we know what we're going to do next.  It’s almost a relief to know that we have at least one thing we can fall back on.

This living situation is driving me insane!  Carol is the single most disorganized person I have ever met, which is pretty bad coming from someone that more often than not cannot find a pair of socks that match. I haven’t been able to get to bed on time since they moved in and I’m not sure how much longer I can take it.  I‘ve told Carol that I have about 4 1/2 hours in which I can sleep Tuesday through Saturday; it is extremely important that I am able to get to bed by 9 o’clock because the less sleep I get, the less civilized I am.  I haven’t been able to get to bed before 10 pm because of the shenanigans.  I have been in a bad mood for over a week already and unfortunately I don’t anticipate this ending anytime soon.  Ashley will not go to bed if Kay is not in bed, and I can’t go to bed if Ashley is still up being the responsible adult that I am.

Monday, December 17, 2012

He who shall not be named

I don’t want to talk about what happened in Connecticut last Friday.  I feel like the media has covered the matter in way too much detail as it is.  Truth be told, I want to complain about the media coverage.  They were interviewing children as they came out of the school building for crying out loud and posting pictures of them sobbing while walking away from the school with their hands on the shoulders of the child in front of them!  We knew the name of that individual before we heard the names of any of the victims.  Those that were on Facebook saw the creation of what seemed like 600 new pages/profiles devoted to the name the media gave out first, who turned out to be the shooter’s brother.  This sick individual became a celebrity the moment the first shot was fired, even if it was only because of the hate and rage at their actions.

When you look at the reaction of the public, everything has degenerated into a flame war.  Some want to increase gun control laws.  Others say that arming teachers is the answer and best way to keep our children safe.  The arguments are broken down into factions: gun enthusiasts, gun control seekers, atheists, über-religious, and the parents like me that are at a complete loss of words.  I don’t know that more gun control laws would make much of a difference; someone that is bound and determined to wreak havoc will find a way.  When it comes to religion, stay out of this type of situation completely.  Lack of religion in our schools did NOT cause this.  The remarks about the children receiving the best gift possible for Christmas, meeting Jesus, were completely insensitive and inappropriate in my eyes.  The comments stating this *proves* that religion is nothing more than the opiate of the masses is equally insensitive. 

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Cloud 9 3/4

Today is the first day this month that I feel optimistic.  Even reflecting on the awfulness of ‘shitstorm Tuesday’ doesn’t bring me down from my perch on cloud nine.  It all started with an email… from Diana.

From: Diana
To: Deza

Hi Deza,

I received notice from our liaison today that the file was sent to the National Visa Center this week.  It usually takes 2-3 weeks for the NVC to receive the file and load it into their system.  I will follow up next week with the NVC and keep you posted.


That three sentence email made up for everything that’s happened in the last 2 months.  I feel hopeful again for the first time in a long time, and I’ll be praying every night that I can finally bring my husband home.  Please please please…

“In all things it is better to hope than to despair.”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


Tuesday, December 11, 2012

#$^%ing Tuesdays

You know how I hate Mondays right?  Well, I loathe Tuesdays with every ounce of my being because anything bad that could happen will happen on a Tuesday.  Murphy’s Law is the guiding principle on a (tues)day in the life of Deza.  That’s why I try to move through the day pretending it’s either Monday or Wednesday; if I don’t think Tuesday thoughts, I might make it out unscathed.  This Tuesday I was not so successful.

At FedEx this morning I managed to take a 30 pound box to the head, with the corner of said box missing my right eye by a matter of inches.  I may develop a shiner yet, but if I do it’ll be so pitiful that people will think it’s a makeup malfunction.  Even if I managed to get a black eye everyone who knows me would assume there was a mildly amusing story behind it since Deza isn't the sort of person that gets into fist fights or bar brawls.  The most impressive bruise I’ve had to date was a rather detailed rendition of a tire tread on my thigh, which was refreshing since I actually knew what would have caused that particular contusion when typically I have no clue how the injury occurred.  Normally I put it down to the fact that I’m hilariously uncoordinated and have the unique ability to trip on a line drawn with chalk on the ground.

Monday, December 10, 2012

Radio Silence

I hate Mondays, but I’m sure by now I’ve made that perfectly clear. Today I’ve made an important decision; in order to preserve my sanity, I’m going to work my frustration off. I’m going to stick to my program (Couch to 5k) and make it work. I’m going to be sensible about my diet and simply avoid sugary snacks/drinks while adhering to a single serving on a modestly sized plate. Most importantly I’m going to practice a form of radio-silence and not discuss it on the Facebook page that my husband sees. I’m going to be quite sneaky about it and hide my shape whenever I see my in-laws, although my face and neck are a giveaway because they get more defined as I lose pounds. Why you ask? Well it’s because I’m going to be selfish for once. I want to see his jaw drop when I go to Mexico in February. I’ve never had the body of a model, but I’m going to have the best body I can manage.

The first week of the program started on December 4th and I discovered that I can handle it. Sure I was wiped out for an hour afterwards and that first day I was so tired, but the next day I felt better. I didn’t have any breathing problems (suck it exercise-induced asthma!) and I wasn’t wobbly from working harder than usual. I think I would have been setting myself up for failure had I not been working out 3 times a week on the machines at work. This program is set up to be 3 times a week for 7 weeks, so we’ll see just how well I progress. I’m not afraid to repeat a week if I think I need more time to get used to the jogging before advancing.