Dr. Lucy is also of the opinion that I need something to do, even if that is simply preparing for the worst case scenario. She says that for someone like me, being stuck in limbo with nothing to work towards is a comparable form of torture to the rack. I need work to do, a plan to make, a goal to achieve so I feel like I’m doing something positive. Whatever I do to keep busy has to be something that will occupy my mind whether I’m actively thinking about it or not. It would also be best if my goal were not exclusively linked to the worst possible outcome. Dr. Lucy suggested I make a list of tasks that would need to be complete in order to facilitate an international move, and another list of issues to solve that would make my life easier here in the US. Then I could compare the lists, find something that overlaps, and work towards solving that issue.
After careful consideration, I’ve decided that my goal should be the irradiation of debt for all accounts in collections first and good standing second. Naturally this choice requires me to do a few organizational steps; creating a spreadsheet to log my transaction details, keeping track of those transaction details for a full month, analyzing the information, and finally compiling that information into a workable budget. Naturally any plan that involves creating a spreadsheet and analyzing results should hold my interest for those 30 days and beyond. I will learn to honor that budget, keep it in sickness and in health, keep only onto it, forsaking all frivolous expenditures, for as long as I can stick to it. x Deza Mendez There, I've vowed and signed it so that makes it official. My accountability month will be September; the first month I have no childcare or anticipated purchases outside of the normal that come from my addiction to shopping at Target. Maybe after September I should switch my minor shopping trips to Wal-Mart, the store I walk out of empty-handed 9 times out of 10 because the People of Wal-Mart annoy me.
I emailed Lance after getting how from Dr. Lucy’s office, mainly to let him know I had a new medication added to my regimen and with a side benefit of perhaps getting a response.
To: Lance
Just a brief update post visit with Dr. Lucy. She is concerned that my anxiety appears to be going through the roof so she's added Zoloft (50mg daily) to my Wellbutrin (300mg daily) to see if that helps to bring my stress down to a manageable level. She also suggested that I start doing something, anything really, to try and keep my mind occupied. Maybe I should start writing my great American novel.
If you want I can request the records from the last time I request up to current and forward those on to you. I imagine the note from yesterday will be an interesting read...
Deza
To: Deza
Here is the plan. I have thought about where we are, and the lack of information. Molly is going to schedule an infopass appointment for me. I will go in-person to speak with an information officer about the petition, the location of the file, and we can do it route it back here to then send it back to where it belongs. It is my theory that when the government denied the adjustment, it failed to note that the I-130 was still viable for consular processing purposes. Thus, the NVC got confused and sent the matter backwards. If we do not get traction this way, then we resort to more aggressive demands and saber rattling.
I must commend you for continuing to pursue justice. However, it would be wrong of me not to point out that you should not sacrifice your life waiting in limbo. If moving for a while will help you recover your strength and give your heart some peace, it is okay. We can continue to fight this stage and then have you participate when the time comes. Life needs to continue, and you deserve a break.
I am not waving any flag of surrender. However, you also deserve to enjoy your youth and your daughter with your partner. I know you are thinking about it, so I thought I add food to your thoughts.
Lance
To: Lance
I wish you luck on your endeavor. Although they will not allow you to bring a saber to the infopass, something about dangerous weapons and all that rot, they did allow my "shanks and ligature" through security. I wanted to remind you just in case you need to fight your way out that it's best to be prepared. I would be more than happy to loan you the blanket I've just started if you wish to go that route.
USCIS would do well to just give in if they wish to be rid of me. I haven't come this far or fought this long to give up. My fear is, as it has always been, my inability to fit in would put Liliana and myself in danger. Another problem is that if we leave, we may not be able to come back. My family would be unable to help us, and most of his family has left the US for good.
I am trying diligently to maintain my humor, as it serves no purpose to wing my hands and weep copiously for what has been lost, but I'm finding it more difficult as time progresses
Deza
To: Deza
My words have been known to sting a soul or two. They are no saber, but I wield them well.
Lance
To: Lance
This would imply that immigration has a soul, a fact that cannot be verified. Go forth and razzle dazzle them... I'll lend you the musical/movie "Chicago" for reference purposes if you want, although the clip can be watched here: Billy Flynn: Razzle Dazzle
Deza
And so ends the month of July and all the aggravations it came with. I’m hoping the adjustment period passes quickly for the Zoloft. There is nothing worse than trying to work with a chronic case of med-head. I'm not really dizzy, but it's kind of like static on a TV or radio where just can't quite get a clear picture of what's going on. Almost like confusion, but I'm confused as to why I'm confused. Does that even make sense? Maybe I should just go lay down for a while. Yeah, laying down sounds like an excellent plan...
Ciao
I emailed Lance after getting how from Dr. Lucy’s office, mainly to let him know I had a new medication added to my regimen and with a side benefit of perhaps getting a response.
To: Lance
Just a brief update post visit with Dr. Lucy. She is concerned that my anxiety appears to be going through the roof so she's added Zoloft (50mg daily) to my Wellbutrin (300mg daily) to see if that helps to bring my stress down to a manageable level. She also suggested that I start doing something, anything really, to try and keep my mind occupied. Maybe I should start writing my great American novel.
If you want I can request the records from the last time I request up to current and forward those on to you. I imagine the note from yesterday will be an interesting read...
Deza
To: Deza
Here is the plan. I have thought about where we are, and the lack of information. Molly is going to schedule an infopass appointment for me. I will go in-person to speak with an information officer about the petition, the location of the file, and we can do it route it back here to then send it back to where it belongs. It is my theory that when the government denied the adjustment, it failed to note that the I-130 was still viable for consular processing purposes. Thus, the NVC got confused and sent the matter backwards. If we do not get traction this way, then we resort to more aggressive demands and saber rattling.
I must commend you for continuing to pursue justice. However, it would be wrong of me not to point out that you should not sacrifice your life waiting in limbo. If moving for a while will help you recover your strength and give your heart some peace, it is okay. We can continue to fight this stage and then have you participate when the time comes. Life needs to continue, and you deserve a break.
I am not waving any flag of surrender. However, you also deserve to enjoy your youth and your daughter with your partner. I know you are thinking about it, so I thought I add food to your thoughts.
Lance
To: Lance
I wish you luck on your endeavor. Although they will not allow you to bring a saber to the infopass, something about dangerous weapons and all that rot, they did allow my "shanks and ligature" through security. I wanted to remind you just in case you need to fight your way out that it's best to be prepared. I would be more than happy to loan you the blanket I've just started if you wish to go that route.
USCIS would do well to just give in if they wish to be rid of me. I haven't come this far or fought this long to give up. My fear is, as it has always been, my inability to fit in would put Liliana and myself in danger. Another problem is that if we leave, we may not be able to come back. My family would be unable to help us, and most of his family has left the US for good.
I am trying diligently to maintain my humor, as it serves no purpose to wing my hands and weep copiously for what has been lost, but I'm finding it more difficult as time progresses
Deza
To: Deza
My words have been known to sting a soul or two. They are no saber, but I wield them well.
Lance
To: Lance
This would imply that immigration has a soul, a fact that cannot be verified. Go forth and razzle dazzle them... I'll lend you the musical/movie "Chicago" for reference purposes if you want, although the clip can be watched here: Billy Flynn: Razzle Dazzle
Deza
And so ends the month of July and all the aggravations it came with. I’m hoping the adjustment period passes quickly for the Zoloft. There is nothing worse than trying to work with a chronic case of med-head. I'm not really dizzy, but it's kind of like static on a TV or radio where just can't quite get a clear picture of what's going on. Almost like confusion, but I'm confused as to why I'm confused. Does that even make sense? Maybe I should just go lay down for a while. Yeah, laying down sounds like an excellent plan...
Ciao
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