Decision 2012

So much for getting some sleep...  Here's a better rundown of the events of the day:

At 3pm today I received an email from the constituent services representative of Senator Franken’s office, Diana that the USCIS had notified them that a notice was mailed today.  USCIS did not let Diana know what the notice said.  I managed to get myself excited at the potential meaning of the notice.   I forwarded the email to Graciela and she responded that she was on pins and needles waiting to see what it would say.  I was floating on cloud nine thinking about all the good things that notice could say.

At 4:30pm I received the email regarding the new case status and saw that a decision had been made on the I-485 (Application to Register Permanent Residence or Adjust Status).  I’ll let you read for yourselves…

Receipt Number: MSC**********

Application Type: I485; APPLICATION TO REGISTER PERMANENT RESIDENCE OR TO ADJUST STATUS

Your Case Status: Decision

On July 18, 2012, we mailed you a denial decision notice for this case I485 APPLICATION TO REGISTER PERMANENT RESIDENCE OR TO ADJUST STATUS.   The notice explains why the denial decision was made and the options that may be available to you.  If you have not received this notice within 15 days of July 18, 2012, please call customer service at 1-800-###-#### for further assistance.

During this step the formal decision (approved/denied) is written and the decision notice is mailed and/or emailed to the applicant/petitioner. You can use our current processing time to gauge when you can expect to receive a final decision.

*** Please do not respond to this e-mail message.

Sincerely,

The U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS)

It’s an odd feeling when your already broken and bleeding heart shatters into a million little pieces.  I forwarded this email to Lance, Graciela, Molly, and Diana constituent services representative of Senator Franken’s Office.  Lance was the first to respond as usual:

To: Deza

From: Lance

Cc: Graciela, Molly

As soon as I receive a copy of the decision, I will contact you.  I am not sure what the basis of the denial is, and I see that there was no change in the status of the waiver receipt.

To: Lance

From: Deza

Cc: Graciela, Molly

What should I tell Alberto when I see him tonight?  He needs to know what is happening and what to expect.  As much as I would love to pass the buck on this one and let someone else tell him, there is no one to tell him but me.

To: Deza

From: Lance

Cc: Graciela, Molly

I can tell him in person.  We have not received the decision in today’s mail.  It might be a technical point that we can resolve quickly so I do not want to dash his hopes.

To: Lance

From: Deza

Cc: Graciela, Molly

I don’t know that I can ever thank you enough for all that you have done for us.

To: Deza

From: Graciela

Cc: Lance, Molly

I was really shocked to see the email re: denial.  Hopefully we’ll get the paperwork in the mail tomorrow and we can figure out why they made such a terrible decision.  We are here to support you.  I know this is difficult (to say the absolute least) but you are handling it like a champ.  We’ll figure something out.

Then I got a response this response from Diana, “I regret to hear this new.  I suggest we wait and see what formal decision information you receive and that you speak with your attorney about options moving forward.”  You can tell it’s a mostly canned response, but then again how does one respond to someone else’s devastating news?  Those are the times you thank God for the Hallmark sympathy cards so you can use someone else’s words in a time when words don’t often come easy.

I left work an hour early at the insistence of my supervisor, Joelle.  Her gentle concern was the final straw that broke the dam that was barely holding back a flood of tears.  I was still in control just enough to make the short trip to the bathroom before my composure completely cracked in two.  I slid to the floor of the stall and sobbed for what felt like hours before I was able to rein in my emotions.  I was blissfully numb as I washed the evidence from my face in cold water.  I managed the drive home without incident, and prepared to tell my parents what had happened.

Ashley came to me when I sat at the kitchen table.  She placed her hands on my cheeks and studied my face as she turned my head side to side.  “What’s wrong Mamí? Porque lloraste?  Le Chingamos?”  I do the same thing whenever she’s upset about something; what’s wrong, why are you crying, and should I spank them (for making you cry) are the three questions I always ask.  For the record, I wouldn’t spank anyone for making Lili cry, but the question seems to make her smile.  I needed to get out of the house and do something, anything to get my mind off of that awful email.  As soon as Ashley finished her snack, we went swimming at the pool closest to the house.  We played in the water and practiced some of the things they do in swim lessons.  I crouched under waterfall so that the water could beat the tension out of my shoulders.  When we finally left, I felt almost human again. 

Tonight I will sleep without crying for what is or what could be.

“My belief has always been… that wherever in this land any individual’s constitutional rights are being unjustly denied, it is the obligation of the federal government – at point of bayonet if necessary – to restore that individual’s constitutional rights.”

Ronald Regan

Ciao